Baseball leprosy, camping and what about Bob?

By Steven Lienert

Teams around Major League Baseball have thrown the Phillies outside of the castle walls. They are stained with the stink of losers, unclean to the point of helplessness.

They have formed a society unto themselves, scrounging for scraps from the free-agent pile for a morsel to get them through to the trade deadline.

When players are mentioned in trade rumors involving Philadelphia, they act like they just been sentenced to life in prison.

When asked about a wild rumor that would land him in Philly, A-Rod chuckled and immediately said he would veto it. We didn't even get the chance to dream.

Why would any team want to infect themselves with Abreuism or Burrellitis? Furthermore, why would any decent player want to don a Phillies uniform?

All of these trade rumors are beginning to get on my nerves. Especially since I don't think Pat Gillick is going to get anyone to bite. Not for Bobby Abreu. Not for Pat Burrell. And not for Tom Gordon.

At least we know they'll slide through waivers after the deadline passes...

Things are eerily quiet up at Lehigh, which is in stark contrast from this time a year ago. Jerome McDougle was shot, Pinkston tore his Achilles and T.O. was about to become the biggest panty-waste in the history of Philly sports.

The goal now is to get through camp as healthy as possible...

Um, did the Flyers fold?

The wire has been peppered with stories of almost every single hockey franchise making significant moves to improve for the upcoming season. The Flyers, meanwhile, have done squat.
Bob Clarke has never looked good in hats, and this particular salary cap is quite unbecoming.

He's operating like he wants to forever remain the last Flyers captain to hoist the Stanley Cup...

Oh, yeah. One more thing: Shockingly enough, Allen Iverson is still a 10-9-8-76er.

Steve Lienert can be reached at stevelienert@hotmail.com or at stevel@phillysportsline.com


Click here for copyright permissions!

Copyright 2006 The Phanatic